Brought to you by Eric, our resident storyteller and member of the support team here at Junction Networks
It’s that time of year again! The pumpkins are found in their natural habitat (at $1 a can at the local A&P), the leaves finally start to match our Thanksgiving decorations, HR is sending out the annual notice about work place appropriate costumes (along with their annual putting the kibosh on my Racy Alexander Graham Bell costume), and the technicians are telling each other scary stories. For the first time ever, we are going to share some of these technician scary stories with you. Grab a blankey, a glass of warm milk, and an adult because these will terrify you!
A Call From The Grave
One day Eric was working the support queue when he got a mysterious call. “I’m having trouble making telephone calls. I’m registered, my phones show up online and there’s money on my account. Can you help me?” “Sure, “ the brave and handsome Eric said. “Let’s run a SIP Trace so we can see what data the phone is sending us.”
They placed the call and Eric GASPED in horror! “My God!” Eric said, “Your phone is using G.723! THAT’S A DEAD CODEC!” ooooOOoooooOOOOO!!!!
Steve's Worst Nightmare
One day, Steve Customer was working late at night when his extension rang. He looked over at the caller ID, and found it was gibberish. He picked up, "Hello?" “Steve, you’re going to work late tonight,” a voice said before the distinctive click of a line going dead. Steve knew someone was just playing a trick on him, but his project was behind schedule and it was getting close to 5 PM.
His phone rang again. “Hello?” Steve breathed. “Steve, you’re going to work LATE tonight!” said the voice. “STOP CALLING ME! I’m trying to get this done!” Steve slammed the phone down.
Unnerved by the mysterious caller, Steve tried to work faster, but he found that he was having trouble concentrating. The phone blasted out its plaintive ringing cry. Purely by reflex he answered the phone. “STEVE! YOU HAVE TO WORK LATE TONIGHT!” Steve looked at his watch! It read 4:50! Terrified, he called his network admin. “I keep getting these horrible calls, but the caller ID is funky,” Steve complained. “I’ll look into it," the technician promised.
The phone rang one more time. “STEVE! YOU HAVE TO WORK ALL WEEKEND!” Steve SCREAMED IN TERROR! He SLAMMED the phone down! His IM program opened up as his Network Admin contacted him. “Steve, I fixed the caller ID. It was your BOSS! THE CALLS ARE COMING FROM INSIDE THE PBX!” ooooOOoooooOOOOO!!!!
Catch your breath because there’s one more and it’s a doozy.
The Legend of Ma Bell
One night, Rob was at an executive slumber party while Mike was telling a scary story from long ago. “Once there was an evil witch named Ma Bell who ruled all of Americaland with an iron fist” Mike started. “She used terrifying arcane taxes and fees, squashing the competition with her considerable wealth to keep the citizens in line. Until, finally, they could take no more!
The peasants revolted and man from Dodge summoned the help of Auntie Trust!" Mike continued, "Auntie Trust was a powerful woman who swung her mighty axe with blows from Cincinnati to the Qwest! From the Horizon to the Verizon! Auntie Trust slew the horrible monster, and the people were free! But, there are some who say she still lives! Using horrible magics called mergers to summon her various parts back together to once more control us all…” “Aw, shucks” Said Rob. “You’re lyin'!” “Am NOT!” said Mike. “Ma Bell still lives today and you can see her anytime you want. Just go into the dark bathroom, look in the mirror and say… “Ma Bell Bill” “Ma Bell Bill” “Ma Bell Bill” John, the other boy at the party, said, “He won’t do it! I dare you! I double dog dare you!” Rob puffed up his chest and proclaimed loudly, “I’ll go in there and I’ll do it right now!” So he did.
In the dark bathroom, his previous courage was gone but he had a reputation to protect so he gulped and said “Ma Bell Bill” ONCE! “Ma Bell Bill” TWICE! “Ma Bell Bill” THRICE! He shut his eyes but when he opened them, only his own face was looking back at him, somewhat scared but getting braver by the second. “Ha. I knew nothing would happen.” Then he turned around and saw stuck to the light switch was AN INVOICE FOR ONE MONTH'S SERVICE! FOR THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
That’s all I have for today, kiddies, but I hope you can stop shaking enough to make it to Halloween. Sweet dreams! Mahwhahahahahahahahahahahahaha!